Closing in on 4pm. Faulty routes through wrong networks. Wondering whether to dig deeper right now or just wait for the afternoon and the night and the new morning to come up with new inspirations and insights. Listening to the change of sound in the afternoon. Still here, still everywhere.
Clouds, slightly more dense by now. But probably still not reliable enough to bear the weight of todays backup. Or: Of context and language and confusing terms for what seems the wrong things. Tempted to get the model involved into this kind of ramifications but then again there has been enough resources spent on nothing again. Like on any other day too.
Closing in on 4pm. Some of the balls thrown up way earlier are about to return, finally. Wondering whether there will be enough hands to catch all of them, but maybe there are still forces to keep them stuck a few feet above ground, motionless yet unreachable. Measuring achievements, closing eyes for a moment, opening again once the dancing spots settled. And stepping out of the flow for a while.
4pm and on the go again. Wild clouds, wild shadows on grey and brown hills. Concrete bridges and an uneven road. Muted everything because no music matches the moment. Inner dialogues like an audio book, challenged though to just step out and listen. Slow motion, little progress.
(Stickiger Hauch in engen Bahnen, zu viele Düfte Gespräche Bewegungen Farben und Schwindelgefühle. Aber auch kurze Wege in dichten Strukturen, allzeit Nähe von fast jedem Thema, das einen irgendwie zu erreichen, zu begeistern weiß. Und immer ein Baum neben allen Fassaden, unter dem sich Schatten finden lässt. Das seltsam ambivalente Privileg der Stadt.)