Selbe Küche, andere Dämmerung. Sauerteig, Kräutertee und der Duft kochender Kartoffeln. Ein später Vogel, eine fremde Katze im Hof. Keine passende Musik, aber damit kommt der Moment klar. Wieder überspannt, zu schnell und zwischen zu vielen Gedanken und Geschichten und trotzdem mit dem Abend versöhnt unter Pastellhimmeln.
Somewhere into the evening and somehow out of that day. Finding that balance between being connected and yet in a mode as close to rest as it could be. Just close enough to the window to catch a glimpse of a few stars, and a few lights speaking of people and flats and the stories that wrap up hours. Engines muttering in front of the pub, neon light filtered through dirt-stained glass, and a distant hum that could be music or just urban aural subtext. Sleepy enough to not care much for now. Have a calm night wherever you are.
Closing in on 10pm. The sound of rain the scent of rain and the mood of a day that remained grey even with these shades being rendered invisible by the late hour. Wrestling after hours, pushing columns of numbers through sheets, unsure again what conclusions to draw and where to guide attention. The right activity at the wrong time and it seems results won't benefit from that. (Decisively powering down. Exercising not-doing anything for now, untrained as one is. Coping with inner feelings of laziness and guilt while being tired enough to justify both. Lost track of time a bit. Have a pleasant sleep wherever you are, once it's here.)
📷 lost-in-moments
10pm and on. Starting that process once again, facing the late hours again and still not having given up trying. Also, wrestling various unpleasant habits, the feeling of guilt for falling prey to them again and again, and for the weakness to not let go of them once and for alll. Window opened wide, head in the sound of late city traffic and music from the pub and the last commuters returning home, slow, tired. The light in everything, the dark in everything. Have a restful night wherever you are.
Finally, 10pm and slowing down. Putting down headphones, as if they had turned too heavy to wear all of a sudden. Music still playing but into an earless void, much more like a memory and maybe that suits well the choice of tracks tonight. With the month moving on, last Christmas lights finally disappeared from the windows and balconies over there, rendering rooms and facades darker again. And even while the days are gradually longer again, there's still so much light vs dark in these moods right now. Standing below backyard trees, breathing winter while mentally yearning for all kinds of possible springs. (Have a night devoid of gloomy dreams, wherever you are!)
📷 lost-in-moments